The First Relationship, A Breakdown Of What Went Wrong

We decided that a fitting first post would cover the first (Biblical) known relationship, and what we now know to have gone wrong. Of course I’m speaking of Adam and Eve. I’m going to cover Genesis 2:15 through 3:24 and break down the text into nice easy to understand chunks so we can see that even a man who knew so much didn’t know jack about women. The following was gleaned from the King James version for those that will wonder.

Here’s a link.

Adam Introduced to the Garden

15. God placed Adam in the garden to take care of it and make it nice, ie  gardener

16-17. God told Adam what he could and could not eat, the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil was forbidden. This was not just a command to be followed, but also a test. Could Adam withstand the temptation of a fruit that could give him knowledge at the cost of his own life? As far as we can tell Adam didn’t have an issue, regular trees good, forbidden tree bad, simple logic.

Hey God I’m Lonely!

18. God stated that man should not be alone, probably right when Adam was starting to feel something was amiss. This shows that God had already made plans to bring about women (insert joke about women being late) to be with men from the beginning, because God does not make mistakes and man being by himself would be a big one. There is also the wording of a companion being called a “helpmeet”, which is defined as, a helpful companion or partner, especially one’s husband or wife. This goes to show that Woman was created to help Adam in completing his God-given tasks, also that Woman was placed in a subservient position to Man.

21-22. This verse is the big one, God puts Adam to sleep, yanks one of his ribs, and makes a woman out of it. Rather vague I know, I’m sure there’s a lot of details that God feels we don’t need to know (probably so we aren’t making our own personal harems out of our ribs…), but this is one of those faith things.  God then introduced Adam to the woman, Adam was probably pretty stoked, he had just named all the animals and after seeing all that fur and stuff, seeing long legs and nice hips probably spun him around. (a lot of what I said is not mentioned in the Bible, just saying.)

 23. This verse goes to state the physical closeness of men and women (flesh of my flesh), but is also metaphorical for the state of mind needed for marriage. Adam then named her, which leads one to think that maybe Woman was less knowledgeable than Adam or else she would have named herself. Then the wording leans the other way and shows the incompleteness of man without woman, or at least a man is more complete with a woman. It shows that neither man nor woman are complete without each other.

24. This verse goes a little further to say that a man would “cleave” to his wife after leaving his parents, meaning that he would have a very strong bond with his wife. Both spiritual and physical.

25. This verse shows that man and women were originally made without sin, and that there was no shame, no reason to hide oneself.

- Bu-bu-but, it’s so pretty!-

3:1 This verse speaks of the serpent, that he was the most subtle, in a cunning and conniving way. He starts his conversation with Woman with an innocent question, putting her at ease so as to catch her hamster unawares.

2-3. Woman states the rules to the serpent in a clear manner, showing a full knowledge of what was expected of her.

4-5. Then the serpent lied to Woman, but mixed in truth. God did know that they would gain knowledge, but the part about them becoming gods is a lie to get Woman to lust after the fruit. The serpent also mixed truth when it said that she wouldn’t die, it wasn’t an instant death but rather an eventual death.

6. Now Woman’s hamster starts spinning at warp speed, rationalizing eating the fruit due to its edible qualities, its appearance, and that it SHOULD BE DESIRED to make oneself wise. That last bit was the kicker, it gave it a good quality, because everyone knows that being wise is good right? She then gave it to Adam, though it is unstated how she convinced him to eat it.

Crime and Punishment

7. This verse tells how their eyes were opened, revealing their nudity and making them ashamed. Theres a lot to this verse if you read between the lines, it shows how man was created without knowing the possibility for sin, but when it had been committed they became knowledgeable of their physical state. It could be said that it wasn’t necessarily the fruit that opened their minds, but the act of committing a sin.They also hid their nakedness, showing their shame.

8. They hid in fear, something they presumably had not felt before, of God and His wrath. Their minds had indeed been awakened to the knowledge of good and evil.

9-10. God called Adam out, and Adam came and admitted his fear and his shame. This shows Adam taking responsibility, even though he did not start the event.

11. In this verse God asks how Adam knew he was naked, showing again that man was originally made blameless. Then God calls him out, knowing what he had done.

12. This verse shows Adam telling the whole truth, not just blaming Woman, although he stated her part. He still admits his choice to eat, showing how a man should act in this situation.

13. God confronts Woman, knowing her part in the sin, but Woman does not admit her fault and instead shifts the blame to the serpent. This shows woman’s weakness when it comes to admitting anything they have done wrong, and paves the way for the actions of the current generations of women.

14-15. God punishes the serpent in this verse, stating that it would be hated and be the least of all the animals.

16. This verse states that women would feel sorrow in conception, the physical pain of losing her virginity, also childbirth would be made painful. (Makes you wonder how it would have been done before.) The last part is the most important, it states that the husbands desires would be hers and that he would rule over her. Some would take this to be a punishment, but I believe God did this in women’s best interest to keep them from increasing their sorrow by following emotional whims. By women following a strong man they would be kept safe from outside influences and from the internal rationalizations.

17-19. The next verses state that because Adam followed his wife’s direction (beta) he would be punished to work and eat of the ground, always toiling away until the day he dies. In this God takes away any great purpose man might have had, instead he would spend all his time wasting away just to make enough food to live by. In reality this was the harshest punishment, gone are all the great things God may have given man, replaced by mindless work and eventual death.

Don’t let the door hit ya where I split ya.

20. Adam named his wife  Eve, showing his dominance over her.

21. God made them clothes from animal skins, starting the need for the sacrifice of an innocent to cover sin.

22-23. In this verse God acknowledges man’s newfound wisdom and removes them from the garden. This does not show weakness but mercy, in that Adam and Eve would not have to live forever in a corrupt world.

24. God kicked them out and placed guards with a powerful weapon to keep people from the tree. Not until the final coming of Christ and the creation of the final heaven will man live forever.

 
These verses describe the first relationship with all its faults, and the potential power a wife can have over her husband. The power to cause a man to do what he knows is wrong, even if it means he will die. Through this it shows the dominance a man needs to have over women, something that can keep them both from harm. A man must use his God-given logic to overcome a woman’s emotional rationalization, and in doing so a man will keep his woman safe and she will trust and respect him. In return a man shall find love and comfort and a peaceful home. So be strong men, do not place your woman on a pedestal, but lead her in a Godly fashion.